Art of Control: "Yes, and..."

Game Design: The Method to Our Madness

In “Yes, And”, we designed a roleplaying game that pulls from the mindset of Improvisation Theater, or Improv. Improv teaches a very important mindset to its students. Those who practice Improv theater learn to be resourceful, take things less seriously, have fun, and expect the unexpected — all qualities that are especially valuable in the bedroom.

The principle of “Yes, And…” is an Improv mindset that teaches flexibility to couples in the bedroom. It’s so easy to worry about making an intimate experience “perfect”, or to get caught up in insecurities or self-talk. With a “Yes, and…” mindset, you are immediately put on your toes, wondering what the next action is going to be. 

We wanted our version of “Yes, And” to be customizable depending on your comfort levels and whether you want this to be part of sexual (physical) play or psychological foreplay. Check out our suggestions to Kink It Up below to see the different options you have to play the game…. We suggest trying them all! :) 

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Ways to Kink It Up: 

  • Use “Yes, And” in the moment that you are playing… when you are finished playing a particular scene, pull out the next card and see what you have to do next.
  • OR, pull out multiple activities at once, and see how many you can do at the same time! Can you pull off "Erotic Dancing" while using "Ice Cubes" and practicing "Orgasm Denial"? (Gauntlet thrown!)
  • You don’t just have to follow the cards that you pull out - add your own spin to it! 
  • Write it down and make it into an erotic love story. 
  • Play “Yes, And” on your own… then text your lover what you are going to act out later.
  • OR, play “Yes, and” alone with solo activities for a sexy self-love session… and send your lover pictures/texts as you narrate how you are pleasuring yourself.
  • Make a private home video as you act out your Erotic Scene. 

Making a Safe Space: 

Playing “Yes, And” does not mean that one can’t say “No” — remember, if you are not in the mood to act something out, even if you have tried that action before, it is totally okay not to do it! 

To limit the chances of “No” before you play, be sure to discuss which activities ARE on the menu before you put them into the Fucket Bucket. Even if you have done an activity like “Rimming” before and thoroughly enjoyed it, does not mean you or your lover may be in the mood or headspace to do that particular activity today. 

With that said -- let's say you or your lover starts "Rimming", and one of you decides that you aren't into it, you both can definitely change your mind or stop that play at ANY time. We recommend using your Stoplight code (check the "Stoplight Scramble" activity for more information).